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Saturday, May 23, 2015

The Worst Interview Ever


Time 6:40 pm
Date 21st May 2015

(I shouldn’t mention the name of person and company)

I was waiting at the reception for last 20 minutes. A blackish skinned lady came to me and asked my resume. She disappeared within couple of seconds and I found myself engaged in the subway surfer to pass the time. Staff members were crossing me one by one to flush their tiredness into the abyss of bathroom.
Mr. Kamal?? A 45 aged person came to me and shook my head in yes to prove his guess right. It didn’t take me even a second to judge me he was the same person who talked me on phone and scheduled my interview in the evening as per my convenience.
Yes… I said and he asked me to follow him to a cabin. I was sure I was the only candidate appearing for interview.
Kamal, I am really impressed with you resume… Very quickly you have received many of things in your career. I admire your talent.
Thank you… I greeted his words and passed him a smile.
2 novels… such great things… here he started the interview round. One by one he kept on to make me mentally injured with his question.

Thanks sir…
Do you get royalty?
Yes sir…
How much?
Sorry… personal things… I can’t disclose…
Why?
My personal work.
You must… anyway… now leave this topic. Tell me what is word? He said and I gave him a weird smile. I appeared for interview in many companies, none asked me this question.
It is nothing…. Just the précised form of sentence. But not in all cases. After thinking a lot, I expressed my thinking.
No… word is the combination of alphabet. Now tell me what is sentence?
It is the combination of words. I replied him in his way.
Again you are wrong. Sentence is the thing which we used to express the feelings. He was proving me wrong again and again.
What is statement? In this world who has right and authority to give statement?
Statement is about the things which already exist. And I really don’t know if government has appointed the person to give statement.
No… statement is the thing which is universal truth.
You are saying the same meaning but by changing the words.
But you are telling wrong.
A person is great when he proves himself right with proving anyone wrong. I was annoyed with his question. He couldn’t say on it and took a glance of resume again.
Both novels are love based, why?
I do write what people want to read.
Love…???
Most probably
But my third novel is not about love.
How do I know… it may be. Interviewer was playing dominating role there.
I can easily see in your resume, you write in both Hindi & English. Does it mean you are good in literature and English?
I really don’t know…. But the thing is people love what I write. I do not write by thinking it on grammar and literature. I just write what my imagination offers.
Okay… can you translate the things from Hindi to English?
I will try.
Hum dariya hain, tum ek jarra bhi nahi, Hum dhud hi lenge tum jao kahi’n…
Sir in the way of English literature, it has no proper meaning.
Really?
As I think.
Okay… tell me what is love?
I really don’t think I should answer this question.
Why?
Because this is not the thing I am going to write here.
How do you know?
It has been over a year I am indulged in the same field for B2B. I wanted to tell him an HR doesn’t know the business of the company, and you are the HR not involved in the business with clients. But I gave pause to my words and kept myself calm.
Okay tell me what is love?
I really don’t think I should answer this question.
Why?
Because I don’t think, it is related to the post I appeared for.
Really? I don’t think so.
But I do.
You should answer. Because you have written love already in your novel.
To write fiction is my hobby.
Okay… I will tell you. Love is nothing, just the feeling of sex. He repeated the same line for three times to prove himself right. But every time I gave him weird expression. I was not agree with his words but I had to keep myself silent.
Okay… I said and he smile to see my agreement.
Okay Kamal… Nice meeting you… now you may leave. Really that was an awkward moment for me. He didn’t take any written taste or something else and asked me to go.
Sir, no written test?
No… this is just an intro-meet.
You would have to come again. For next 3 rounds.
Sir, I can’t take leave again and again from my present company.
But, we can’t judge anyone in first meet. Do you have any other question? He asked and I passed him a bad smile. Anybody could easily see that I was not happy with that meet.
No… I replied genuinely.
Think again… may be you want to ask something.
No sir…
Okay Kamal… thank you. He said and forwarded hand for shaking. I grabbed his palm with both my hands which I leant during b.tech. Then I passed him a smile with the heart and left the room.

- Kamal Paneru

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